Song of the Week:
Sad Disco by: Flipturn
Co-Collective: Matney
In my final year at Sac State, I took Interior Design 25 with Ms. Potts. Despite being a lower-division prerequisite, I had to wait until my last year to take it because of poorly planning the admissions. Surprisingly, it turned out to be one of my favorite classes at Sac State, which says a lot. Was I particularly skilled at building models with cardboard and glue in the end? Unfortunately, no—but what I lacked in craftsmanship, I made up for in the meaningful connections I formed in that class.
Graciously joining me today is someone here to help boost a topic I lightly touched on a couple of months ago: the intersection of overconsumption and gender. She’s an expert in all things fashion, with a keen eye for style and trends, and the only person I’d ever consider stealing clothes from (if she’d let me). Beyond her impeccable taste, she has a deep understanding of how consumer culture impacts women, making her the perfect person to unpack this important conversation with me.
How about we start with introducing yourself. Name, where you are from, credit score, social security number, etc.?
Mat: Helloo, my name is Matney Oliveira, I’m 22, born and raised in the middle of nowhere California, living here in the state’s capital on my way to somewhere bigger. Thank you for having me, and your very kind intro, it’s hard to be humble after that intro. I’m so so excited to be here and to be asked for my little thoughts! I’ve always wanted to do something like this and just find things like this a big step toward the right direction. It can feel embarrassing and vulnerable to speak so outwardly of my opinion, especially with social media and the whole world finding you.Â
Well, this space has been a dream of mine—a haven for people like you, who have opinions they’re eager to share but perhaps feel they have nowhere to turn, or maybe even feel afraid to speak up. So, welcome to The Unfinished Times! There’s real power in vocalizing your thoughts—letting every word you say become a piece of yourself advocating for you. Keyword: should. Yet, so often, people act like the smallest disagreements are world-ending—like whether or not a hotdog is a sandwich (it’s not, for the record).
My hope is that this space inspires you to keep expressing yourself boldly. This world will tear you down every inch you let it. And when we keep at it, someday, the world will listen.
Speaking of listening, have you ever noticed how much of our struggle stems from a lack of it? I have this theory that Earth feels like a prison for our souls because we fail to truly listen—to ourselves, to our parents, to one another, and even to animals and nature.
Take the “Pink Tax,” for example—the gendered price gap in everyday items. It highlights how ignoring these issues perpetuates inequality and widens the financial divide. More importantly, why aren’t we listening to those who’ve been calling this out for years?
Mat: I can’t begin to tell you how many papers I’ve written on this very topic, and what’s amazing is that we can talk about it forever because it’s not something that’s on the forefront of the public’s mind. To put it straight: Women make 80 cents to a man’s dollar, they must pay for feminine products monthly for their period, mean can save an extra 20 bucks. Now before I get ahead of myself, yes, California and 29 other states have banned the pink tax, thank God! But why do 21 other states have to still endure a tax off of necessity, especially when most of those states have the lowest minimum wage.
With that being said, we can’t just avoid the money spent on ourselves, the 20 dollars spent on tampons, pads, and all the other bits and bobs that come with feminine products are a necessity; so I fall speechless knowing there was a literal tax just for women based on their necessities.
And let’s say the pink tax is banned in the country and all is well, the price of products geared towards women are still more expensive than male marketed products. If it’s not tax, we’re paying for then it’s the general product. What really gets me going is knowing that women are the market! It’s women who push the economy! Without our money that is spent on feminine products, skin care, household appliances, cleaning supplies, groceries, Taylor Swift concerts, beauty products, hair care, home decor, clothing, essentially everything you can find in a Target, the economy would simply dwindle into financial starvation. If women decided one day that they were simply sick and tired of playing a desperate game, they would stop buying. They would free bleed and stop buying feminine “Hygiene” products, they would get to sleep in longer because they no longer need to apply makeup or do their hair, they would wear the same trend from last year and not care because all the other women are wearing clothes from last year. Men would view us as deranged and crazy for simply existing and not consuming, and the market would be desperate for attention.
The amazing part is how genius it all is, to corner a market based on absolute necessity where we have no choice but to pay the higher tax because we must tend to our natural cycle. Marketing makes women look desperate in this case.
You’ve painted such a vivid picture of how deeply embedded these systems are, and it’s clear how much power women hold in shaping the economy. And something I have touched on in a previous post about women running this world. We have the power to turn this system upside down and change it.
But this brings me to another thought: in what ways might women unconsciously uphold patriarchal values, and how can this be addressed in day-to-day life?
Mat: I think a lot of it is subconscious, especially through family values, lessons from elders, status quo. For a long time, it was men in charge of marketing, and they marketed products. Products that in a way came off as offering. But if you watch the ads, or dissect the images, you can see that the product is actually being instated. Not only were men in charge of everything in the workforce that put together these products from idea to wholesale, they also were husbands and men of the house. What they wanted from their wives and what they needed them to do was reinforced by these messages from the next best Hoover vacuum, or Mary Kay make-up. This then begins to trickle down from mother to daughter: “If you want to be married this is what you have to do” or “if you want to find a husband this is how you must look” and “if you want to live the perfect life this is how you must act”.
I see generations of this reinforcement at my own place of work. I’m a stylist at a women’s clothing store and hearing the things that women say to themselves are deceitful and such a masculine way of seeing themselves. They call themself fat, old, wrinkled, with too much flab under their arms. They apologize for not wearing makeup, or not being well dressed like it is a fault. They believe they are taking up too much space because they’ve been belittled for their looks. They talk like this to themselves and to others, because they have this hierarchy of vanity values that men from the past place. When these women tell me these things I just want to shake them up and tell them that “I’m a woman! I see you as beautiful with or without those things.”
I know I’m guilty of playing into the very games these powerful companies have designed—selling us products they know aren’t good for us and not necessary, telling myself I need to achieve some random beauty standards I have conceived in my own head. My anger stems from the government not caring if these products are helpful or harmful. Obviously, illegal products that burn your face off but what about tampon poisoning or chap sticks having anti-moisturizing agents, so you buy more? As consumers we are getting scammed!
Furthermore, I have a big problem with big corporations swooping in to buy out their competitors. Take Black-owned businesses, for instance—when we try to support them, big corporations swoop in, buy them out, and cheapen the ingredients to cut costs. Even when we aim to make more sustainable choices, those options often come with their own set of challenges, leaving us feeling like we’re fighting an uphill battle. It’s as if every time we try to change our habits, big corporations are already on the offensive, ready to profit off our good intentions.
Sadly we have become a society that nitpicks at every quirk a human can possess. There is always a beauty product trending; micro-taping, collagen supplements, Korean sunscreen, BHAs and AHAs, heatless curls— and I get it. We can become more beautiful but is it too much?
Mat: In regard to aging, it’s sad that we promote youth more than the celebration of aging. We work harder to look younger than we are the older we get. Instead of finding growth through our youth. It’s anti-aging this and Botox that, what age is young enough?
Through a friend of a friend, she quotes “The wrinkles on our face are signs of wisdom, and our hair changes colors like the leaves in different seasons.”
I think of the quote often because we’re marketed at by saying the quirks and differences of ourselves are something to be fixed but, who are they to say anything was broken. Most importantly, why do we accept that.
It’s also important to note that the internet loves to share its beauty secrets, routines, and products. Much of the internet thrives off of finding an exact cure or how to achieve a certain look that’s not natural to their own. So many people are upset over buying and trying someone’s 12-step hair care routine and wondering why it doesn’t work on them. It’s because they discounted the fact that our genetic makeup is NOT the same. It’s so silly and so blatant, yet the internet is so shallow, people turn off their brains and just expect results, or fulfillment, or distraction. I mean people do bizarre things like tape their mouth, wrap their chin, wear a mask to bed; and what is it all for? To point out to others that there are things to fix. There’s no reason to be so self-conscious. They don’t realize that the internet can say so much if we just read an image, follow the context of a video, or even look at a caption. The thing about the internet is that it can tell us so much even if we’re not looking. It can tell us what to buy, who to cancel, how to dress, how to cook, how to look better.Â
I love that quote; it is so cheesy and just pulls at my heart to old kind folks. I agree the self-hatred on the internet is fed to us in a self-care way that we are misguided in our beliefs in how to take care of ourselves. I guess to alleviate the off balance is representation in the media.
Their generation grew up without the internet or Wi-Fi, relying on posters and radio, which can’t compare to the challenges of growing up in the 21st century. In your opinion, do you think social media and influencer culture has made it harder or easier to recognize subliminal misogyny? Or even marketing techniques in general?Â
Mat: The way marketing has completely tangled social media into this marketing web is quite astonishing. Social media first started out as this place where people shared the littlest snippets of their lives, for example: their favorite hot dog place on a Tuesday, their nail color, grandpa’s 80th birthday… Now social media is a place where you can watch an entire person’s day in 20 seconds, or someone’s Get ready with me for bed highly overconsumption routine. The thing is people love that! Social media is vanity driven, so everyone watching wants to have the skin of an influencer, the kitchen tools of an influencer, the closet of an influencer. It’s a game of “Well, if everyone has one, I want one” but the thing is that there are millions of influencers, opening up PR packages every day, trying a product out once then, never using it again. Micro micro trends running rampant on Instagram and TikTok. I question, is anyone tired?Â
Because I’m sick, I’m over inundated with the things people fill their lives with so they can have people tell them what they need as opposed to the things that will benefit who they are. I need some critical thinking up in this bitch!
AMEN! I mean we need critical thinking ASAP, no rocky. Speaking for myself, I absolutely despise the way platforms are on a mission to sell us things we don’t need, yet somehow turn them into trends. Take, for example, that shaving cream that looks like whipped cream—it went viral for removing the fine hair on your face. Like, what?!? Why are we wasting our money on that? It’s just satisfying to watch, but at the end of the day, it’s unnecessary! Do not buy it! And if you need to make content… I think women, in particular, need to establish strong boundaries between what’s genuinely useful and what’s just a “satisfying” concept that plays into consumerism.
Having that boundary can A) save you a shit ton of money and B) calm your mind to stop wanting the next trending aesthetics that gets shoved into our faces. I want people to understand that influencers make money by making you buy said product.
They have infiltrated our safety net, i.e word of mouth that a product is actually good or not. Recommendations are becoming less and less useful because did you get paid to say that or do you really think the product is that good. How crazy is that?
Mat: To be honest, I think we as consumers are being mocked. It seems like we’re not even interested in what the product is anymore, we’re just buying the person who uses or sells it. I just saw this video of this girl who went to the Skims x North Face collab pop up. She wanted the nude ski suit, though she doesn’t ski, and bought the last XS ski suit in the entire collection just because she wanted the limited-edition merch. Let that sink in…I mean I know North Face is a reputable winter, athletic, all weather apparel producer. I would recommend North Face products because I’ve worn them, now I can’t vouch for Skims products, but from what I’ve seen, her shapewear, apparel, and clothes are wonderful.
Now let’s say Kim Kardashian made Skims but it’s a terrible product, and let’s say North Face made mediocre products, but the collection looked the same. People would still buy it because it’s beautiful although not practical, just to praise their love for Kim not the product. I also think people recommend these products with a thumbs up so they can get closer to notoriety, the celebrity, or a bigger paycheck.
I think there are some people out there who give shiiiit recommendations for a paycheck. I think if you want to find useful information then, listen to someone who explains the why’s. Someone who can point out the flaws of the product or what the ingredients mean, or the certain type of consumer made for this product. After you’ve listened to their honest review, DO YOUR OWN RESEARCH! I mean people literally recommend Shein, or give Temu hauls, or other fast fashion brands when they don’t actually review the quality of the product, it is just aesthetic and cuteness and how much stuff they got for under 40 bucks. They don’t tell you about how that entire shirt came apart in the wash, or that they’ve had to sew the buttons back on after just opening it out of the package. We buy all these things, or these products just because everyone else did, or because they were trending for 3 weeks, then we give it up and move onto the next thing. We toss it or donate it, and let it pollute.
This is where the beauty of thrifting, vintage items, and heirlooms comes in. I thrift because the clothes not only last longer, but they also just had better style. These pieces carry a sense of history and craftsmanship that’s often missing in today’s mass production. Most designs are willy-nilly never thinking about combining the beauty and versatility together. Vintage finds remind us of a time when items were made with care, intention, and individuality—qualities worth valuing in a world obsessed with fast and disposable goods. Unfortunately, the next decades won’t have the finds we have.
Even when I go thrifting, I spot Shein clothing, and it is cute, but the material is absolutely shitty and at Goodwill they charge more than what you could buy it for online! Meaning no one will buy it and they will just have to throw it away into another landfill.
So, what steps can individuals take to challenge the societal norms that drive gender inequality in spending and representation?
Mat: Simply stop putting pressure on yourself. When you stop, and take a breath, you no longer fill the needs of over-consumption. You can step back and actually find yourself. I think the consumption of media that is perpetually telling you what you need if you want to be someone else is just simply killing individuality. It’s individuality that keeps the world spinning. If we all were meant to be the same, then we all would’ve been born identical. I think when you find yourself, you’ll finally understand what you need, there won’t be this pressure of what you want to appear to be. You can exist in your own skin and be enough, but the standard of enough has to be accepted by you.
I second that. The pressure is real but it doesn’t have to be. The same energy it takes to create it you can also destroy and be at please instead of at war. So much easier to say than practice and here I go repeating myself, life is all about the journey and just trying. Trying to find the balance of peace and war. This day and age I think we have too much war aimed at the wrong target so instead collectively we just need to find peace and bring war to the real target.
To end it all, I think next week will be a Christmas spirit-ish theme that falls in line with overconsumption. I do want to thank you for your thoughts. They have been released onto the internet for forever now. Any last words to the people?
Mat: Ya know what? I do have last words; this is what I leave you with: The world makes Christmas so important; the importance is loved ones. I ask everyone to stay intentional for the next couple of weeks. Just stop, slow down, and look around. I have a hard time with this myself, but I find ways to stay grounded. I do these two ways, I go on walks around my favorite neighborhoods, and I just stare at everything I find beautiful, which is a lot. I look at trees and think about them and what it means to me. I watch birds, look at the houses and what I can see through the window as I walk on the sidewalk (I’m also very curious about people’s homes), I just try to get lost in thought over the things I see. Two, I try to journal any encounter, image, or just sight I saw that day. I spend my day being vividly aware of what is happening around me then, when I get home, whatever I can deeply recall, I write down. Sometimes this spirals into my own little fiction as to what these things and people are when I’m not witnessing them. I rewrite it like a story. Make it whatever you need it to be to make Life worth living.
The Human Experience
That brings me to the Song of the Week, Sad Disco by Flipturn, a band from Florida. I have recently been diving into their discography, and I can say I am impressed so far.
This song especially just hits all the right instrumental dings in my brain and the voice is truly angelic with it. I think this song is a true testament to feeling helpless in a situation when you have no control. In the end, you have to let it go and commit to falling. The falling is what sets you free from the feeling and instead of worrying about this or that. The fall is known and there is comfortability in knowing.
Don’t forget to follow me for more insightful content, give a shout-out to spread the word, and consider signing up for our Co-Collective to be part of our vibrant community. And if you missed any posts from previous weeks, take a moment to catch up! Let’s continue exploring, sharing, and growing together! <3 See you in the next post~XOXO
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